start something new...

hesitation

2012-02-09T00:01:00.006-07:00

I'm the girl who waits until she's sure and by the time she knows, it's too late.

Sometimes I forget that life doesn't hold still just because I'm indecisive.

Maybe I fear regret of doing more than I fear regret of not doing.

Or maybe I fear success because I might not know how to handle it.

I'm good at heartache and disappointment. It's familiar and I know how I deal.

But for some reason, it's so difficult for me to believe that success will come. Maybe that's because I think I won't know what to do when it does.

image via

If you knew me better...

2012-01-30T22:28:00.009-07:00

you'd know that I've had my fair share of hard conversations and I do just fine

that I will never resent you for your weaknesses, if you're patient with mine

that I will never expect you to do more than just try

If you knew me better, you'd know that I think with my head and decide with my heart

that I'm a natural optimist

that regardless of what happens, I'll be okay

If you knew me better, you'd know that I'm not in this just for me,

and that I'd love nothing more than to be something you need

But really, if you knew me better, you'd know that honestly, I just want to get to know you better

image

*And nearly two years ago, somehow I knew this would pretty much sum it up.

girl power

2012-01-26T23:16:00.004-07:00

This past week, I've been in a retro girl power mood. Madonna, Whitney, even a little Mariah and K Clark (who I realize is not from the same era, but really, she's got enough soul and spunk to fit in with those ladies, right?).

Anyway, apart from filling my ears with the beautiful soundtrack of the 80s, this week has been great. Major events:

-Monday--all-nighter scrambling to get everything ready for Tuesday, 1am 7-11 run for hot cocoa and only getting 30 minutes of sleep before heading to Sundance.

-Tuesday--Recruiter's fair up at Sundance. Got to talk to some really cool agencies and make some good connections. I'm slowly realizing that graduation is actually going to come and I'm going to have to grow up and be a real adult. Yikes/Yay!

-Wednesday--Meeting with more recruiters and following up with those from Tuesday. Ice cream social with the Leo Burnett crew.

-Today--Catching up on some homework, Adlab stuff, random errands. Comfort Food (aka grilled cheese and homemade tomato soup) party at mi casa with all the ad geeks. We all just chilled, played a little Just Dance 3 and it was fantastic. I seriously love my major and all the people in it. We know how to work hard and play hard.

It was a stressful but really good week. It's nice to be able to see my work on a website (check it out, kids!). I'm really proud of it, so that always makes it easier to show to other people.

weekend

2012-01-16T13:56:00.003-07:00

An El Salvador clan reunion a mi casa with late night pizza making and inside jokes,

a very entertaining commercial shoot,

a fantastic concert by Ryan Innes (blows me away every time, check him out here),

an uplifting and hilarious Sunday watching Downton Abbey and Boy Meets World with a favorite movie-watching comrade,

Kneader's all you can eat french toast with the roomies this morning,

and this beautiful Monday holiday.

Couldn't have asked for a better weekend.

Hopefully this means I'm refreshed and prepared to kick some advertising butt this week getting ready for next week.

Wish me luck.

have a little faith

2012-01-13T14:22:00.004-07:00

Right now, I'm learning a little about faith.

In myself, in others and in a loving God who has a plan for me.

Someone who knows the timing better than I do, and who can see the whole picture.

On a less dramatic note, in 11 days representatives from 14 ad agencies are coming to look at our portfolios and I get nauseated just thinking about that.

I'm really excited, but this just means I have to be ready to show my soul to them in advertising form and hope that they like it.

It's vulnerability to a degree that I have not yet experienced.

But I prefer this to stagnant growth any day.

Here's to the sweat and tears that will be spent over the next 11 days, putting my book through the refiner's fire.

And here's to having a little faith.

The Help

2012-01-11T15:33:00.002-07:00

As if enough book clubs haven't blogged about this book already, I'm going to add my nickel or dime, too.

I feel like Skeeter and I are kind of similar. 23, college graduate (or soon-to-be), single and trying to write out a place in the world.

Since the first time I went to South Carolina when I was a little girl, I've loved the South. Maybe it's my grandmother's Charlestonian blood running through my veins.

I feel confident that I could live in the South for only one reason: the food. And after reading about Minny's caramel cakes, and fried chicken and pork chops, all I want is some down home barbeque.

Over Thanksgiving, my family visited the National Civil Rights Museum in Memphis. I could have spent all day walking through the exhibit, reading the labels and quotes from everyday people and prominent leaders of that movement, but we only had a couple of hours.

We saw the room where Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated and read about so many others who suffered simply for trying to speak out. It became so much more real to me. I have so much admiration for those who fearlessly fight for justice, anywhere and everywhere. Whether that is by staying put in a bus seat or taking huge risks to report the truth.

All I can really say about The Help is: read it.

And then think about it.

We study history so we don't repeat it. But, just like everything in life, it's never all bad. I loved reading the stories of tightly-knit bonds between women, remembering that despite the tough times, in the long run charity never fails.

image via google

12

2012-01-01T14:52:00.004-07:00

Maybe my New Year's resolution should be to stop neglecting this little blog of mine so often.

Just to warn, this is going to be one of those catch all, catch up posts. Don't expect beautiful writing or any attempts at poetry; it's just the raw, real stuff.

Because life is messy sometimes.

So let's see, major updates:

1st semester of the creative track is done. (weird, but it was a crazy busy, fun, good time)

I'm graduating in less than 5 months.

I'm realizing I'm much more of a flirt than I thought. (good or bad? This could be a post of it's own, so maybe more on this later).

Finals are over and grades turned out better, in some classes, than I expected.

Christmas at home was wonderful. My family is incredible. Lunch with Dad, Downton Abbey with Mom, last minute Christmas shopping and Panda Express with the little brother, Portland adventures with the sister (and sister's friends) and bro-in-law, sooo many treats and tins of fudge with Oma, a family history lesson with Opa, a visit from Grandad, and plenty of Rock Band and Just Dance with all.

New Year's adventures in Portland with Hilamonster (aka this girl Hilary who made sure I didn't die in El Salvador): getting kicked out of a birthday party turning into a girls night out on the town, eating sick-nasty oatmeal at Le Montage (potential remnants of ashtray contents included), and a rockin New Year's Eve dance party.

Welcome, 2012.

Here's to another year of adventures and misadventures, and all the nonsense in between.

(Oh, and as far as boys go, I can't say there is a boy, but there is the hope of something with a certain boy.)

The legacy of Atticus Finch

2011-11-28T07:17:00.000-07:00

"I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is am an with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what." --Atticus Finch, To Kill a Mockingbird

I read To Kill a Mockingbird when I was about 13, and loved the story. I felt like Scout, and my dad was my Atticus.

This week I read it again, with a 23-year old perspective, and dug deep into the pages of the story and the social commentary that goes along with them. I thought about families, communities, rights and wrongs and the wisdom of Scout Finch.

It's so much more than a story about racism or prejudice. It's about the strength of a family, the power of communities (for good or for evil), the simple things in life, and the never-ending debate of right vs. wrong, and what we should do with our rights about those wrongs.

It made me think about what I think and how that influences my actions. It made me long for times when life may have seemed simpler on the outside, but there were wars to fight inwardly.

Sometimes it's good to be reminded of the true strength of the human spirit.

image via

patience

2011-11-26T10:26:00.000-07:00

To the boy who was always in the background:

I definitely, definitely took you for granted.
And right when I thought I'd let you catch up, you seem to have stopped chasing me.

I would say I wish I'd figured this out sooner, but this is all part of the process, really. And timing is tricky, so I think I'll leave it up to Someone who can see the whole picture.

So maybe it will never be, or maybe it just won't be right now.

But I want you to know that I'm not going anywhere.
And, no, that doesn't mean I'm standing still, it just means that I get it.

I was too scared to go for it, for fear of a nasty outcome, but after all this time I'm finally realizing: you're worth the risk.

And if you're worth the risk, you're worth the wait, too.

mountains

2011-11-15T15:38:00.004-07:00

Oh wow.

So it's been a while, right?

Somehow this semester is still shaping up to be crazy busy, because I am working fewer hours and I quit the ballroom team/world.

I love it, and I love the things I'm doing, but sometimes there are days when it just swallows me up.

A lot has happened and a lot has stayed the same in the past few weeks.

I dated someone and then I didn't date someone.

I didn't know what I wanted and I felt unsettled about the whole thing, so I ended it.

And now I think I know what I want, but I'm not sure how to go after it. Or if I should wait for it to come after me. Or worry that it won't.

But this is familiar, I'm used to being this girl. And I'm good at it. And I'm trying to muster up some hope because doubt is my vice.

I just have to keep treading water and telling myself that somehow I will get everything done that I need to, and if I don't, then it probably wasn't that important anyway.

So we'll see what the rest of this season holds. But, come what may, I'm going to make it great.

soundtrack to my morning:

2011-11-02T10:22:00.002-07:00

Happy birthday to me:

2011-10-06T10:59:00.006-07:00

By the way, Monday was my birthday.

23.

We had an orange food night.*

"Orange food nights" originated when I was in high school, and my best friend Britt and I would go to the 24 hour grocery store and stock our cart with our favorite junk foods, which all happened to be in the orange-yellow-beige color palette. We'd go home, put in a disc of Gilmore Girls and stuff our faces in true Gilmore style.

We'd savor the sickeningly cheesy flavors of Velveeta Shells & Cheese, french bread with nutella, Wheat Thins with cream cheese and orange soda. Often followed by some midnight cookie dough (more than once without baking any cookies).

This year we made a few fantastic additions: Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch and Garden Salsa SunChips.

A night with the girls is always worth the stomachache that inevitably follows.

*note: this is an exception to all of the food rules I profess in my life and all over this blog. But birthdays are the perfect occasion for breaking the rules.

image via

rain

2011-10-06T10:52:00.004-07:00

Apparently, this post was a false alarm, but I think now the chill is here to stay.

I think this is the first semester where I love all of my classes. I've always loved learning and have taken some valuable classes from really insightful professors, but there has always been one class that gets put on the back burner while I focus on the rest.

I'm taking a Literature and Film class and it is fascinating. Our instructor's research emphasis is in cultural studies, specifically how romance and love are portrayed in our society through film. We've read studies about romance and relationship addiction, analyzed several films and works of literature and had some of the most interesting discussions I've had in college so far.

My Persuasive Writing professor, who is oddly similar in speech and mannerisms to my dad, is teaching us how to use argumentative writing to solve real problems in communities. Our assignment for the semester is to find a real problem and work toward a practical solution to it. And he's not lying. Several of his past students have actually implemented their ideas and created significant change.

My advertising classes are inspiring, as always, and I feel like I'm constantly learning about my own creative process and how to refine my ideas. I get to make a legitimate commercial this semester and that has been exhausting, at times, but so exciting. I'm learning about the way typography, photography, graphic design and all kinds of visuals communicate in different ways. And I've been pumping out concepts, roughs and comprehensive campaigns since day one of our creative track class.

I'm loving every minute of it.

just checking in

2011-09-27T21:43:00.001-07:00

to say that I'm alive.

I know it's been a while, but I haven't felt inspired to write.
At least not here.

But I will soon.

And, for what it's worth, I've started at least 5 posts in the past few weeks, but they always end up half finished, in the drafts folder.

autumn

2011-09-11T21:34:00.005-07:00

It's officially cold enough to break out the cardigans and scarves and that makes me a little giddy.

I really love summer and sunshine and all that comes with that, but I can't wait to wake up with a mug of hot cocoa or cider, pumpkin carving for Halloween, or the smell of rain.

I think this semester is going to be a great one. The first two weeks have been pretty good and I'm still really busy, but it's a busy that I can handle. The good kind of busy, is what I keep telling people.

The changing of seasons is so refreshing, and it makes me excited and anxious for what this year holds.

NYC: 1, LA: 0

2011-08-22T15:15:00.000-07:00

I was planning on writing a post about how I conquered the local bus system, and finally figured out how to navigate around this little town sans roommate's car or favors from my neighbors.

But then I waited half an hour for a bus that never came (when they only come every hour anyway), and decided that my trusty little legs are better than any air-conditioned seat on a bus.

At least for now.

I'm still determined to figure out at least a couple necessary bus routes to the grocery store and other important places, but we'll save that for another day.

When people ask me where I want to intern/work after I graduate, I usually say New York City or LA, and that I'm pretty torn between the two.

But since LA means traffic and traffic means white knuckles and stress, today I'm leaning toward the Big Apple. or maybe the Windy City.

Committed

2011-08-21T17:42:00.000-07:00

Today is my parent's 30th wedding anniversary.

I am so grateful for the example of commitment and true love they show to me and my siblings. No marriage is easy, and my parents have had plenty of tough times, but I am so grateful for the character they possess in the face of difficulty.

The Coalwells are not quitters.

We don't give up when it gets hard.
We don't do things unless we're going to do them well.
We don't start something unless we're going to finish it.

Thanks, Mom and Dad, for teaching me that and so much more.

Summer reminds us every year to keep our hearts young

2011-08-17T11:49:00.001-07:00

Okay, so I couldn't find a decent quality live version of this song, but I'm completely smitten with it.

It's so childlike and innocent.

So just listen to it, and then go run through the nearest sprinklers you can find.

Not just another last name

2011-08-11T14:52:00.000-07:00

Love-to-be:

Someday, when we take a road trip to your hometown (whether it's 3 days driving or 45 minutes away) so I can meet your folks,

I want to see your high school and eat at the restaurant you bussed tables at before college.
I want to go to your little sister's dance recital, and watch your nephews play little league.
I want to visit with your mom while we clean up the dinner dishes and see all of those embarrassing pictures of you when you were awkward and brace-faced and thirteen.
I want to go out to dinner with your grandparents and listen to them tell all the stories you've heard every year since you were little.

I even want your Dad to tease me because I say "pop" instead of "soda" or the way I jump ten feet if someone sneaks up behind me.

And I hope you don't find it strange that I'll want to send your mother a card on her birthday, or remember to leave the pecans out of the brownies because your little brother is allergic.

You see, my family means everything to me. So if I'm going to become part of your family, too,

well, I'm all in.

To the boy in the computer lab:

2011-08-09T16:34:00.000-07:00

Funny how the two of us come here almost every day,

but I don't know your name

or anything about you

Except that you probably know Excel much better than I do,

you check your email almost as much as I do

and you're a PC

If this was a romantic comedy, there would be a mix up at the printer and somehow I'd end up with your calculus review sheet, and you'd go home with my art history slide list and that would give me an excuse to talk to you.

And naturally, I'd ask you why you are taking calculus, and maybe you're a business major, or maybe you are one of those blessed souls who wants to teach 17 year olds about integrals and derivatives.

And I'd tell you that in high school, I spent the majority of my calculus experience listening to Three Days Grace on a borrowed iPod.

And you'd confess that your guilty pleasure music is Hanson post-MMMBop.

And I'd laugh.

Hard.

And you'd like that.

And the beginning would really be that easy.

*meet me at the printer in 5?*

A few good words

2011-08-07T14:34:00.000-07:00

"The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache."
-Marjorie Pay Hinckley

"The secret of happiness is not in doing what one likes to do, but in liking what one has to do."
-Richard L. Evans

"People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway. If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway. What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway. Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway. In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway."
-Mother Theresa

I love that last one. happiness is a choice and some of the happiest people I know, have some of the toughest problems, but they've found a way to see the good through it all.

homemade

2011-08-04T15:34:00.001-07:00

I just finished reading A Homemade Life by Molly Wizenberg. She's the writer of Orangette. She has this magical way of writing like she's had you over for lunch, and after your belly is satisfied like it's never been before, you ask for the recipe, and she, graciously, obliges. And then she tells you about that one time when she made it for so-and-so and suddenly you're off on some tangent that will, inevitably, lead you back to the table.

Since Sunday afternoon, when I started it, this book has been my late night dessert each evening. Not only have I loved curling up in my bed just before I go to sleep, to drool over the recipes and stories Molly tells, I have loved making time in my schedule to read. It has been too long, but it is such a treat.

I loved it. And I may just gain 200 pounds from trying all of the recipes. Although, to Molly's credit, there are enough salads in that book to balance out the butter, chocolate, and whipped cream that fill the rest of the pages.

So thanks, Molly, for confirming that a life centered around the kitchen is perfectly balanced. And that real life fairy tales actually begin with chocolate cake instead of poison apples.

career addendum

2011-08-03T15:19:00.000-07:00

Okay, I love writing.

And copywriting.

Really, I do.

The fact that my future career will include sitting in an office full of interesting people and coming up with ideas is so exciting to me. Who else gets to watch random Youtube Videos, surf Twitter, and scribble in a notebook all day and call it work?

I can't wait for the late nights coupled with cartons of orange chicken and fried rice, rushed deadlines, last minute changes, rejections and redos, brain frustration, pages and pages of words reduced to one line, and finally, the success of knowing we nailed it.

I am also realizing how much I love reading, eating and writing about food.

So I'm trying to figure out how I could combine those two passions of mine into something that can support that orange chicken addiction, or the fact that I really, really stink at scrimping on grocery bills.

And this would, naturally, be the part where I tell you that I discovered a fantastic career option and have decided to become a _____. However, the point of writing all this was that I have no idea what sort of combination of copywriting and cooking would actually suit me.

Ideas?

music to my soul

2011-08-02T16:08:00.000-07:00

{This is the song that made me fall in love with Carbon Leaf}

My relationship with music can be pretty random.

There are some days where I'll listen to the same song 10 times in a row, and other days where my mix will be nothing short of Ella Fitzgerald, the Les Miserables soundtrack and Hanson.

I've never been someone who defines themselves by the music they listen to. I don't know everything about classic rock, or have 40 hours of orchestral music on my iPod, and I don't only listen to bands that no one has heard of.

But I love the Joshua Tree album, anything by Frank Sinatra, the Chopin nocturnes (thank you, parents), and a few bands that no one I know seems to be familiar with.

Carbon Leaf, Stephen Kellogg and the Sixers, and Jon McLaughlin are the musical men that I've had pretty long term relationships with, stereo speaking. I don't listen to them every day, but I've never played one of their songs and not fallen in love with them all over again.

I saw Carbon Leaf in concert last summer at one of my favorite little concert venues, literally an old garage turned hipster scene. It was incredible. I don't know what it is about their music, but it hits me right in the soul. It's like coming home.

SK and the Sixers has some kind of drawl, but they aren't really country, and their music doesn't make me want to dance, but it makes me love my life a little bit more.

In 2008, when I saw Sara Bareilles in concert, I found out later that she'd been touring with Jon, but not when I saw her. Jon McLaughlin's music is like a breath of much needed fresh air. It's like a weekend in the country, when you've been stuck at the office all week, smothered in city smog and subway steel. (Not that I've actually had that experience, but I'm pretty sure if I had, Jon's music is the sort of thing that would keep me sane.)

They are like old friends that, even when we haven't talked in a few months or years, when we bump into each other and decide to grab lunch, after five minutes, it's like we're back in high school and we never lost touch.

Relay for Life 2011

2011-07-31T14:57:00.000-07:00

Everyone knows someone who is/has been/will be affected by cancer. It's an awful disease that both takes lives and produces survivors.

We can't hide from it. We can't stop fighting to find out more about it and figure out how to beat it.

A few friends and I made a Relay for Life team (our event is this Friday-Saturday) and we're trying raise money for the cause. Here is a website we've set up to make online donations simple and safe for those who want to help!

All of the money raised goes to the American Cancer Society to fight the battle against cancer. This is a great opportunity to remember those who have passed away from cancer, those who have beat it and those who are still fighting!

Even the smallest donations add up, so if you can even spare 5 bucks, we welcome it!

Thank you so much!

miracles

2011-07-30T21:26:00.000-07:00

"23And these three men, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, fell down bound into the midst of the burning fiery furnace.

...

25He answered and said, Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no ^ahurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.

26¶Then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the mouth of the burning fiery furnace, and spake, and said, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, ye servants of the most high God, come forth, and come hither. Then Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, came forth of the midst of the fire.

27And the princes, governors, and captains, and the king’s counsellors, being gathered together, saw these men, upon whose bodies the ^afire had no power, nor was an hair of their head singed, neither were their coats ^bchanged, nor the smell of fire had passed on them.

28Then Nebuchadnezzar spake, and said, Blessed be the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego, who hath sent his ^aangel, and delivered his servants that ^btrusted in him, and ^chave changed the king’s word, and yielded their bodies, that they might not serve nor worship any god, except their own God."

Daniel 3:23-28

I've always been amazed by this story. It would have been so incredible to witness this miracle and see the men in the furnace emerge unscathed.

But it also makes me think of the story of Abinadi. I'm sure he was just as faithful and devoted to God as Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego, but he was not saved from his fire.

Anyway, that made me think about trials I've experienced and the trials I've witnessed others struggle with, and how sometimes the Lord chooses to take away the pain, and sometimes he lets us experience it.

But I think that is because we all learn and grow in different ways. Sometimes our faith grows by witnessing a miracle, and sometimes the miracle is that even after the tough times, we can still believe. He knows us and He knows not only what we need, but how we need it.

And I am so grateful for that.

Good Morning Green

2011-07-28T12:59:00.000-07:00

"Green (or rather, purple) smoothies" in the morning may just be my new favorite thing.

I'll admit, I was a surefire skeptic at first. But I'm getting better at making them like anything but spinach. The one I made this morning was my favorite so far:

big handful of spinach
spoonful of whole flax seeds
unsweetened almond milk
mixed berries (black, blue and raspberries)
two heaping spoonfuls of honey greek yogurt

I blended it until it was a creamy lavender whipped mess and it was the perfect breakfast.

Good food can be good for you.

"The most terrible battles leave some places untouched, protected, despite being surrounded by fire."

2011-07-28T09:52:00.000-07:00

How perfectly convenient that, yesterday, as I was waiting for the timer on the chocolate chip cookies to go off, I curled up in an armchair in our parlor* to get sucked into the first part of Suite Francaise, "Storm in June," while outside drops of rain as big as marbles fell all along the ground, and thunder shook the walls of this antique house.

My parents gave me this book for Christmas and I am finally getting around to reading it. It was actually the bit on the back of the book about the author, not the plot synopsis that caught my interest originally:

"When Irene Nemirovsky began working on Suite Francaise, she was already a highly successful writer living in Paris. But she was also a Jew, and in 1942 she was arrested and deported to Auschwitz, where she died. For sixty-four years, this novel remained hidden and unknown."

I really like the book so far. I am always so inspired by stories of ordinary people and the things that happen to them.

This part especially struck me:

"In all her life the woman had probably never said anything but ordinary things, like 'the leeks are getting bigger' or 'who's the dirty pig who got my floor all muddy?'...What are we in people's eyes, Maurice and I, other than two miserable employees? It's true in a way, but in another way, we are precious and unique. I know that too...All they could do was to keep walking and place themselves in the hands of God."

image via this

*so named by my landlords.

In case you were wondering,

2011-07-27T13:31:00.000-07:00

Love-to-be:

I don't believe in diet fads, 1200 calories a day, or ever being too shy to wear a swimsuit in the summer.

I don't believe in stuffing lunchboxes with twinkies, fruit by the foot, or gushers.

I don't believe in going into debt to buy a house bigger than we need, or a car we can't afford.

I don't believe in going to bed angry.

I do believe in eating well, and the way a kitchen makes a home.

I believe in apple slices and peanut butter, homemade chocolate chip cookies and turkey sandwiches on thick whole wheat bread.

I believe in saving pennies and doing without, but also rewarding ourselves for our hard work.

I believe in taking a plate of brownies to new neighbors and smiling at the mailman.

I believe in little league, ballet classes and parking lot pickup basketball games.

I believe in "goodbye"s closely followed by "I love you"s.

And don't worry, I believe in road trips with greasy fingers from french fries, and Happy Meal toys for the kids, and frozen pizza for lazy Friday nights (or Saturday morning breakfasts), and buying girl scout cookies from the 10 year old down the street and chocolate any time of day, and buying just about anything little kids sell at a roadside stand.

image via vi.sualize.us

Confessions of a cosmetically-challenged 22 year old

2011-07-26T22:50:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm not a tomboy.

But still, when I walk down every aisle of the makeup section, I'm a little in awe at all the powders, creams, compacts, tubes, and wonder how I managed to go almost 23 years without actually knowing how to apply eyeshadow or eyeliner to my top lashes.

Or figuring out which shade of lipstick flatters my features.

I grew up playing with my mom's makeup, dolling my face up for dance recitals and sneaking fuchsia Wet N' Wild lipstick in my 3rd grade backpack, but somehow got lost in between the month where I didn't where makeup at all and the stage makeup that, well, only looks good on stage.

But apparently my beauty regimen is pretty basic, and apparently that means I need a little help in the "big girl" makeup department (aka the kind you buy at the counter, not the register)

Today, I went in search of a new shade of lipstick. The one that I dab just a bit of on my lips in the morning is nice, but I've had it for years and I'm pretty sure it came from one of those free gifts you get when you (or, in my case, my mother) purchase some Lancome mascara or Benefit blush.

Anyway, I perused all the basic drugstore brands' selections of lip tints, glosses, and sticks, so wanting to be the girl who could pull off "fire," but realizing that "rose petal" probably better suits my complexion. And I remembered that one time 8 years ago when my mom pulled out her seasonal color analysis book and we tried to figure out if I was a summer or a winter, and I couldn't remember if I had a warm or a cool undertone.

And after disregarding that momentary stress, I grabbed a tube called "cherries in the snow," threw it in my basket and hoped that it wouldn't make me look like a clown.

And, you know, I tried it on tonight, and I think it just might work.

image via google

ps: I can tell you, that my mom bought me some Nars blush over Christmas (with a color title that makes my cheeks flush) from Sephora and I absolutely love it. I may be hooked.

Virginia

2011-07-19T14:35:00.000-07:00

There is something deep inside my soul that pulls me to Virginia.

And I have no idea why.

I have only been there once, with my sister to visit her then boyfriend who was a grad. student at UVA, but I remember the smell and the heat of summer, and the rain. And the heat in the rain in the summer.

And maybe it's just another facet of my love affair with southern life or my not-so-hidden desire to be the next Paula Deen.

But of all the places I may end up, 20 years from now, with a little family and an old house and a life that I love, I think I could be very happy in a smallish town in Virginia.

But that is really all I know right now.

the unposted

2011-07-19T14:17:00.000-07:00

83.

That is the number of drafts I have for this blog.

Some of them are unfinished, some of them are just a title, and some of them are nothing more than a few words to prompt a future thought.

But a few of them, are polished and perfect and maybe a bit too personal.

These are the things I will never publish,

at least not in this space.

The words that aren't vague enough to camouflage their true subjects.

The melancholy memories that creep up on me, even after I've long since put them to rest.

There are times when I'm tempted to give myself a new identity and create a fresh dashboard with no attachment to my name, just for the sake of posting these thoughts that are maybe too much for this blog.

But, the thing is, there is a a very fine line between the things I'll never say, and the thoughts I ache to be read.

For now, it is enough to keep them tucked away in that folder, crossing my fingers that I don't accidentally release them to an unsuspecting audience (it would not be the first time). Perhaps, a boy who may stumble upon this little space, by chance.

And I read them. Sometimes over and over. I remember how and who I was when I wrote these words.

And, like a lot of things, it's a bit sweeter because no one else gets to know.

we won't be leaving by the same road that we came by*

2011-07-19T14:00:00.000-07:00

{I found this in my "Drafts" folder today, and I can't quite remember what prompted me to write it, which must mean it's safe now to post, right?}

And we won't be the same people when we leave either.
Because the rocks and the ridges in the road shape the pattern of our footprints.

And because we grow up, and we grow together, and we grow wiser.

So that we realize there are things about the person we used to be that we'd prefer to leave in the past.

We leave those pieces of us for the journal entries and the photo albums, tucked away to remember, but also to forget.

Like a mental list of who not to be.

It's good to remember, because it allows us to see how far we've come.

But it's better to forget, because then we can finally be free.

*Keane, you have been my muse for the past two and a half weeks. So thanks for that.

foodie

2011-07-17T15:26:00.000-07:00

If I knew as a child how much I would love to cook as a college student, I probably would have taken more advantage of my mom's kitchen smarts.

I can think of all those time she tried to teach my sister and I how to cook and we had zero desire to learn.
I guess some things you just have to learn out of necessity.

Somehow, when people ask me what I like to do, I never know what to say.

I mean,
I've done dance my whole life, so I guess that's one.
Like almost anyone, I love watching movies and going to concerts.
I like to write.
I like to read.
And, I guess, I love to cook.

And I like a whole lot of other things, but for some reason, they all slip my mind when people bring up "hobbies."

Today, Kellie and I made a peanut butter cheesecake and ended up with extra filling, so we made some chocolate brownies and marbled the batter on top...and still had some extra filling, so we're going to make some yummy cheesecake bites. I swear, this is like the neverending fountain of cheesecake.

Sundays are the best.

This is the brownie recipe we used. We haven't tried it yet, but i'm sure it's divine.

All is well

2011-07-15T18:12:00.000-07:00

So glad I finally finished the series. In 4 weeks, I read books 5-7 (the 7th at about 10:15 last night), watched movies 1-4, 5 and 7.1, and remembered that I love to read.

And I love magic.

Thanks for reminding us that, in the end, good will always triumph.

image via

why not

2011-07-12T15:06:00.000-07:00

Something about him had stuck with her, and it would creep up on her when she heard a song that sounded like one he wrote or ran down his side of the street.

It hadn't even been anything, but it still hurt.

That time, he had been the one to say no.

Well, he didn't actually say it out loud.

But she knew.

Somehow his rejection had hurt more than the others. It was that curious kind of hurt, like when you peel back the bandaid just to see if the graze is healing, except that by doing so, you only make it worse.

Because the hardest part about the whole situation was not knowing why.

Or why not, rather.

But,

we never really do find out why, do we?

dare you to move

2011-07-12T13:31:00.001-07:00

Every once in a while, a song comes on the radio,

not a new song,

but one that knows you by heart;

it stops you in your tracks,

and it's all you can do to just remember to breathe.

This is one of those songs.

vintage

2011-07-07T11:23:00.000-07:00

I've never been very trendy.

Not to say I don't take effort in putting myself together, but I grew up with my mother's and grandmother's examples of timeless class rather than of-the-minute fashion fads.

However, I've always been partial to old things, so I guess you could say I'm vintage in the sense that I love old movies, used books and the music of my parents' and grandparents' era.

Someday when my bookshelves stop moving themselves every year or so, I'll stock them with a collection of Barbra Streisand movies, books I've read and reread so many times they automatically open to my favorite pages, and Rat Pack records that make that scratchy sound when placed on the turntable.

the downward glance

2011-07-05T11:22:00.000-07:00

I have this bad habit.

For years, it seemed like no one remembered me.
I would meet someone (sometimes multiple times) and if we didn't see each other for a while (or even if we saw each other the next day),

I would remember, but they wouldn't.
I could tell them where we met and what we talked about, but they would reintroduce themselves like it had never happened.

So I perfected this halfway downward glance. A defense mechanism, of sorts, to protect my ego against that harsh lack of words or even a look of recognition, for those times when I passed someone in the hall or on the street that I recognized,

but I just assumed they wouldn't recognize me.

Look up, Oh look who it is, quickly-look-down-again-before-he-thinks-I'm-staring, head down, fiddle with whatever happens to be in my purse, slowly raise my gaze, just enough to check if his pupils are scanning in my direction, and if/when they aren't, look away and walk on by.

But then there is always the backward glance, just out of curiosity, to see if maybe, he realized who I was a split second too late.

I've gotten better, really, I have. I've even gotten up the nerve to be the first one to say hello. Which, believe me, is very outside-comfort zone for me.

But today, it happened again. And it was silly, really. Because I knew he would remember...but the thing is...I wanted him to speak first. Because I had the last word last time.

This land

2011-07-04T17:43:00.000-07:00

If,

twenty years from now I take my own little family to the local football stadium to watch fireworks with a picnic basket of sandwiches, apple slices and raspberry lemonade,

a few lawn chairs on my back and an armful of old blankets,

and a deck of playing cards in my back pocket to entertain us while we wait for the show to begin,

I hope that I still get chills when the local girl or boy sings the national anthem.

I hope that even before my children learn to walk, they know that you stand when you see the American flag,

that you show respect to your leaders and those who fight to defend this country (even when you disagree with the policy or the conflict),

that you can fulfill any and all of your dreams if you're willing to work for it,

and I hope that gratitude for the freedoms we enjoy in this country still brings me to tears.

Happy Independence day! God Bless this land!

image via deviantart

Follow up to "Date a Girl Who Reads"

2011-07-01T11:58:00.000-07:00

The other day my mother and I were talking about our favorite children's books, and I was struck with such gratitude that my parents read to me as a child. I remember so many times sitting on my Dad's lap, reading Make Way for Ducklings or Harry the Dirty Dog. Later, the baton was passed to me and I would get to take a turn reading a chapter of The Forest Runners. Or going to the library with my mom to get my first library card, and discovering the pure discovery that is reading.

While my older sister was flying through Agatha Christie mysteries and Jane Eyre, I was hooked on Harriet the Spy, Maniac Magee and Homer Price.

The first book I ever read from my Dad's bookshelves (stocked with classic literature) was To Kill a Mockingbird. And when people ask me what my favorite book is, that's still what I say.

I remember as a little kid, when I found a book I really liked, I worried that if I closed it before finishing, the story would go on without me. Somehow the characters would resolve their conflicts and fall in or out of love and I'd miss out, unless I sat there and read to the end.

I've always loved reading, but I haven't always made it a priority or given it the time it deserves (or the time I want to give it). This week I remembered why I love it so much and forgot how I really survived on a diet solely comprised of textbooks and news articles.

But I've mended my ways and I'm making a summer reading list (suggestions welcome!), because that's what summer is for, right?

Here's to my parents, for teaching me the beauty of great stories.

Read This

2011-07-01T11:28:00.000-07:00

I realize that dozens of other blogs and websites have posted this already, and I could probably just link to it, but I want to make sure you read it. (I found this from Meg Fee's re-post of it. Sometimes I want to steal Meg's Google Reader because she finds the best bits of writing!)

Because it's absolutely exquisite.

"Date a Girl Who Reads by Rosemarie Urquico

Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas, and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by God, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes."

Yes oh yes. Rosemarie, you nailed it.

and she's back

2011-06-15T17:27:00.000-07:00

She took some time and took off for a new life and when she returned after a month and a half, it was almost like it hadn't happened.

Except that it did.

And she couldn't (wouldn't) deny that because she was different.

The conversations, the culture and the people she met were unforgettable. The experience was like a giant growth spurt and like any growing pains, it hurt to leave.

She didn't feel quite ready to give it up.

She knew the home she was coming back to would be pretty much the same, but she would never be the same girl as before she left.

And because she was different, everything would change.

Check out my Salvadoran life

2011-05-24T12:40:00.000-07:00

Hey, kids. Sorry I haven't been writing much lately. I've been busy doing a myriad of projects in El Salvador, and if you want to hear about it, check this out.

one for the readers

2011-05-03T08:35:00.000-07:00

I haven't been a very good blog friend lately.
I've written a few posts, but none that are worth sharing with the world. Some too personal, some just not inspired.

Either way, here's an update:
I leave for El Salvador in less than 24 hours. Read about my adventures here. I probably won't be posting much on this blog until I get back.

Anyway, what it really comes down to is this: I'm going to El Salvador!!!!!!!!

Spring Haikus

2011-04-27T13:29:00.000-07:00

No more blow dryers

Packing away all my coats

Time for sunny days

One week till I leave

New places, scary but fun

I can barely wait

Of course before I

leave I might meet someone great

but they can sit tight

a question

2011-04-26T00:08:00.000-07:00

Love-to-be:

You're old fashioned and I'm a little old fashioned,

so why don't we take black and white photographs and name our children Lucy and Harold

and build a home out of pennies and patience

and you'll read the paper as I'm finishing up dinner and after the food is gone we'll sit at the table for hours,

still hungry for each other's company,

even after all these years?

image via

that time

2011-04-20T21:32:00.001-07:00

so it's that time of year again.
when people graduate.
when people leave.
and this time, I'm leaving, too. (but i'm coming back.)

It's kind of weird to think that two weeks from today, I'll be on my way to (or maybe already in) El Salvador.
I finally get to put a stamp in my passport.
I've gotten my vaccinations (heavens, 3 in one day was a baaad idea)
I have a plane ticket.
I still need to pack.
I still need to buy a few things, like Chacos and cheap, quick-drying skirts and T shirts.

And, don't tell anyone, but: I'm a little.bit.scared.

It's unknown, but it's going to be exciting. And the unknownness is what is exciting.

This is a big step for me.
I committed to this a few months ago, and I'm following through with it, and that is an accomplishment all on its own.

And whatever this trip ends up being, it will be good for me. Because learning is never a bad thing.

image via vi.sualize.us

one of my favorites so far:

2011-04-20T13:10:00.001-07:00

So sometimes I read this blog "letters to crushes"*

Today, I read a post titled "The best places to fall in love are book stores and libraries."

Oh boy, oh boy do I agree with that.

Full post here. Read it.

*Thank you, miss Katya, for introducing me to it!

Copywriter

2011-04-15T12:03:00.000-07:00

Give me five seconds to be totally self-absorbed and braggy to say:

I GOT INTO THE CREATIVE TRACK!

For those of you non-advertising majors, this means that I get to call myself a real writer of copy and get to work on cool projects, spend hours and hours brainstorming and juicing my brain of creative brilliance.

I can't wait.

this is me:

2011-04-12T15:55:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went grocery shopping at my favorite little grocery store.

As I was walking around the store, my basket overflowing with fruit, vegetables, nuts, and whole grains, I remembered a part of myself that had been set aside.

A part of me that had been overshadowed by big generic supermarkets, small paychecks and relying on others for transportation, but was just waiting to come to the surface.

To remind me of some things I really care about.

So this is me, at least when it comes to food:

I like to buy organic*
I like to buy local
I like to buy free range animal products*
I care about the planet
I prefer wheat
I have a slight addiction to greek yogurt

So maybe it's time I start living up to who I really am, and how I really want to eat.

{I can't wait until the farmers market starts up again!}

*when people ask me why, it catches me off guard and my mind blanks on the research, but basically it comes down to this: I like my food without a side of pesticides.
* This is another one that, for some, requires explanation. My thoughts are: healthy animals make healthy animal products.

image via

the substitute people

2011-04-02T15:18:00.000-07:00

From Elizabethtown. I sort of love that movie.

Claire: "Do you want to hear my theory?"
Drew: "Of course."
Claire: "You and I have a special talent, and I saw it immediately."
Drew: "Tell me."
Claire: "We're the substitute people."
Drew: "Substitute people?"
Claire: "I've been a substitute person my whole life. I'm not an Ellen; I never wanted to be an Ellen. And I'm not a Cindy either, although Chucks loves me."
Drew: "I'm sure they do."
...
Claire: "I'm impossible to forget, but I'm hard to remember."

image via this and this

why I love advertising:

2011-03-29T00:12:00.001-07:00

Because even at 1 am, when we've already been here for 9 hours today, and we're tired and sugar-overloaded...we all still want to be here.

Because looking at blogs, surfing facebook and looking up information on wikipedia all counts as research.

Because our professors care enough to hang out with us until the work is finished, even if the stuff doesn't get done until 1am.

Because everyone brings food to share.

Because it's just fun.

A conversationalist

2011-03-22T10:37:00.000-07:00

Love-to-be:

Please be the kind of guy who can just as easily chat with the cashier at the grocery store or the CEO of a major corporation.

And please make sure you tip well at restaurants. Trust me, I've been a server.

Because I know if you show consideration and genuine interest in the lives of people you barely know, you'll treat me with the same respect.

xoxo,
Just Me

Grateful

2011-03-21T10:47:00.000-07:00

Life is just so good.

Let me tell you a story

2011-03-20T22:24:00.001-07:00

A boy walked in the room.
A boy she'd seen before, one she'd met once, several years ago, but it was a brief encounter and not one he'd probably remember.
But she remembered, like she always did.

Boy: "I've met you before..."
Girl: "Yeah, we met freshman year once. It's _______, right?"
Boy: "Wow. Yeah."
Girl (to his other friend): "Yeah, and I think I met you, too. It's _______, right?"
Other Boy: "That is an impressive memory!"

(semi awkward pause)

Boy: "Wait, so how did we meet?"
Girl: "We met at _____'s cabin one time; I wore your sweatpants." (What?! Did I really just tell him that?? stupid. stupid. stupid.)
Boy: "Whoa, really?! Wow. And that was the only time we met?"
Girl: "Yeah, remember? we all jumped in the creek in the morning, and got soaked."

Boy: "Oh yeah, I do remember jumping in the creek" (But clearly, he doesn't remember me...dang)

Lesson Learned: If you happen to have a near stalker-like memory when it comes to people (not your fault, you were programmed that way), don't let on so quickly. Play the "Oh yeah, you look kind of familiar to me too..." card for at least 10 minutes and then slowly work in the "wait..do you know so-and-so??"

This is a much better solution than the "Oh yeah, Firstname Lastname, don't you remember the 30 second introduction we had 3 years ago with Mutual Friend in Random Location where you told me you are from Hometown and you have Number of kids in your family. Wait...and you don't even remember my name?"

Whoops.

Crunch Time

2011-03-15T16:45:00.001-07:00

Okay, guys.

I know you're there, somewhere. (and if you're reading this, yes, I mean YOU).

I'm working on my creative portfolio and I need to include a few things:

a little bit about myself

some brilliant advertising

and (here's where you come in)

a few writing samples, extra creative stuff that doesn't fit anywhere else.

If you've read one of my blog posts or one hundred, now is your chance to tell me what your favorites are.

So pretty please leave me a comment with the title/link to a post of mine that you thought was good enough to reread.

image via

a taste

2011-03-09T17:26:00.001-07:00

Today I wore no jacket to school.

And I walked to class

And I wasn't cold.

California runs through my blood and I crave the beach almost as much as I crave chocolate.

Today felt a little bit like the beginning of spring, and the end of a winter that wasn't the most stressful, but it had its moments.

Today was a day when the world was conquered.

When somehow everything came together and worked, even when I was sure it wouldn't.

And for that, I am grateful.

images via this

remember to breathe

2011-03-08T01:08:00.001-07:00

It's one o clock in the morning and I'm still up.

I feel an interesting mix of energized and overwhelmed.
I know that when my alarm goes off tomorrow morning (at the bright hour of 6), I'll wish I'd have gone to bed a little earlier.

But I was up talking to my best friend, what can you say?

There is still an Art History test to be studied for.
And some work to be done.
And a meal to be planned
And some clever lines of copy to be written.

Sometimes I wish I had a span of 48 hours to not sleep and just get things done. Check off the tasks on my to do list for the next week, so I could actually enjoy the fun things.

But, alas, 5 hour energies and cups of coffee are not really my style.

Un-Do List

2011-03-07T00:29:00.001-07:00

Things I did NOT accomplish today:
-writing the thank you notes I need to
-addressing fundraising letters for this little trip
-laundry
-applying for a few more scholarships for next year.

However, I was able to:
-make a dozen homemade bagels (they were delicious)
-make a pizza to use up some leftover pizza sauce
-spend some quality time with the roommates
-listen to the words of some inspired leaders at stake conference and at the CES fireside. (L. Tom Perry is my hero).
-meet some new people and laugh...a lot.

Oh well. There is always tomorrow.

ps: two of my favorite women in the whole wide world are coming to visit me this week. and I couldn't be more excited!

everything is more romantic in french

2011-03-07T00:00:00.000-07:00

This may just be one of the most romantic songs I've ever heard.
I fell in love with it when I heard it play at the end of French Kiss.

Louis Armstrong's trumpet can take my breath away any day.
And Edith Piaf's voice is incredible.

I don't even need to hear the words to want to melt into some dashing man's arms and forget the world.

the kitchen

2011-02-25T11:50:00.000-07:00

the darkest chocolate couldn't compete with the brown in her eyes as she wheeled that horn of plenty to the kitchen door.

the kitchen,
where tomatoes marry milk, butter and basil
to make a pot of soup
to share at the dinner table
across from the man with salt and pepper hair.

they talk about the city, the state, the world
theories are touted, and definitions are discovered

an encyclopedia is the entree
that complements the creamy tomato soup.

their conversation continues long after
the soup spoons are cold
and the bread is no more than crumbs
and water droplets have dripped down the sides of the water goblets.

and as she stacks the two bowls in one hand and walks over to rinse them in the sink,
he remembers how she wanted a house with a big kitchen
and why he was okay with that.

for my mom, my dad, and our kitchen.

eat it up

2011-02-21T12:08:00.000-07:00

I love to cook.

At 16, when my mother was anxiously trying to pass on some of her food wisdom, I never would have expected the above statement to be true.

To be honest, I was intimidated by the measuring cups, the saucepans and the kitchen stove.

The idea that with a prayer and a great recipe (or no recipe at all!) one could whip up something delicious was completely foreign to me.

When I moved into my first apartment (after living in the dorms and eating cafeteria food all year..,remind me, how is the first year of college any different from high school?), I lived off of grilled cheese sandwiches, condensed tomato soup, and cheese quesadillas.

(I know, Mom, you taught me better than that.)

It wasn't until a couple of years ago that I had an epiphany I could almost taste:

I can do this; cooking really isn't that hard.

I learned that the worst that can happen is that you have a great story to tell about the time when you burned the toast three times in a row, or when you forgot to grease the cake pan.

And the best than can happen is that you make a batch of brownies that sort of become legend in some circles, or you sit down to a Sunday dinner that actually resembles your grandmother's cooking.

But more than just cooking, I really learned how to eat.

I learned to like* salad.
I learned that almost any vegetable tastes delicious if it's sauteed in olive oil and salt and pepper.
I learned that the best chocolate cake doesn't come from a box, but from my grandmother's recipe book.

This is all just to say that I'm feeling pretty confident with the knowledge that my future children will not starve, and even better, won't survive solely PB &J and macaroni and cheese.

*read: tolerate
**A couple of weeks ago, I discovered Orangette....oh to make delicious food and write about it all day.

I officially have too many blogs

2011-02-16T17:30:00.000-07:00

And apparently not enough to write about.

I apologize if you expected this to be inspiring or beautifully written or poetic.

Today is just a typical day, full of the ordinary.

But I'm completely okay with that.

Life is still busy.

And complicated.

And sometimes stressful.

And exhausting.

But it's still really good.

Anyway, I started another blog.

To tell you all about my adventures this summer in El Salvador.

So check it out, if you're curious what I'll be doing.

El salvador

2011-02-07T07:01:00.000-07:00

Hey, remember this little poll?

Turns out the answer is none of the above.

Looks like I'll be working on #1 and #15 from this list this spring for 6 weeks.

I'm excited to get my hands dirty, to push my mental and physical limits, to experience true culture shock, and to learn more from the people I'm working with than I could possibly ever teach them.

It's going to be a real adventure,

and I can't wait.

grin and bear it

2011-02-04T20:58:00.000-07:00

I realized something about myself the other day.
Something different.
Not a huge change.
But, for me, a significant one.

I smile bigger than I used to.
Not more,
bigger.

Wider smiles at people I know.
Smiling with my eyes and not just my lips.
Even a few of those big, cheesy grins at complete strangers (the kind I used to balk at and think of as so fake)

And I don't think it's because of anything in particular.
It's because I'm just...happy.
And I've been happy for a while, but
I think it's more that my outlook on life is generally a positive one.

Because there are still times when I'm annoyed or frustrated or upset (sometimes warranted, sometimes not).
But I've learned, I guess, to not let those moments define me.

Life is a gift.
And even when life is awful, there are still some not so awful parts of it (however hard to find they may be).

So if you think this sounds like an overly-optimistic rant that should have been put at the end of a low budget chick flick/church film, you're probably right.

But, oh well, maybe life is sometimes like the movies.

image via

family

2011-01-23T19:56:00.000-07:00

{I've recently fallen in love with the man behind this music.
How does John Legend hit it every time?}

My family is everything to me.
They are my anchor.
And maybe we aren't perfect, because we're just people.
But they are perfect for me.

I love that the way we celebrate is by sitting down to a beautiful table to enjoy heaping plates of delicious homemade goodness.
I love that we always bicker about which direction to pass the food around the table, and what the difference is between yams and sweet potatoes.

I love that when Dad says "What we have here...is failure to communicate," we all catch the reference.
I love that Mom and I always rewind and replay our favorite parts of First Wives Club, You've Got Mail and Return to Me. And that I grew up watching Barbra Streisand movies.
I love that Christine and I can swap recipes and that we cooked a Thanksgiving feast for the two of us and Blake, because we couldn't cut out any of our favorite dishes.
I love that Kevin has the same teachers that Christine and I had growing up, and that they still remember us.
I love the late night chats Dad and I would have when I got home from working at Anthony's and needed to relax.
I love having Oma and Opa ten minutes away and sharing Sunday dinners with them.

I love that being a Coalwell means you say "police officer" instead of "cop," you probably speak some amount of another language, you don't jump on trampolines, and you love to learn.

I'm so glad we'll all be together forever.
Because it's going to be unbelievable.

I'll always be into print

2011-01-21T11:47:00.001-07:00

Loving this campaign and the purpose behind it.

Beauty is always better when it's back with good intentions.

photo via adsoftheworld

take it slow

2011-01-20T16:46:00.001-07:00

I have had a lot of really wonderful, completely ordinary everyday moments. And those moments have made my life an adventure.

empowered

2011-01-15T11:54:00.000-07:00

One of my unofficial goals for this new year is to start doing yoga.

Today as we were all laying on our mats at the end of class with the lights out, just breathing and trying not to think too much, this phrase cut through the clutter of my mind:

I'm stronger than my weaknesses

We all are.
I don't think I'm much of a runner when it comes to life's issues.
I tend to have the "it's like swallowing a pill" mentality to facing challenges and doing hard things; take a breath and it will be over soon.

But sometimes it's hard to turn off my brain and just let life happen.
Instead of trying to protect myself from every situation.
Because I only have so much control over what will happen.

So I think that will be my new manifesto (or one of them).
Because I have no reason to fear.
This life is beautiful; it's a gift.
And our souls are stronger than our weakest moments.

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me then will I make weak things become strong unto them."

-Ether 12: 27

image via deviantart

a new year

2010-12-27T23:41:00.000-07:00

2010 was a good year, just like 2009. (goodness, I can't believe another year has already passed)

I...
-made the ballroom dance team(yay!)
-got into the advertising program (double yay!)
-moved into a lovely little house with the same lovely ladies I've been living with for a while now
-grew up just a little bit more, fancy that.
-didn't move home for the summer. and that meant growing up and paying bills and being really busy, but loving it at the same time.
-wrote a lot more poetry than I ever have before.
-learned a little more about love and life and loving my life.

This year is going to be a good one. I just know it.
I've been thinking a little bit about resolutions and goals and what I want to commit to this year.
But I haven't made any decisions yet.
So I'll let you know when I have.

image via deviantart

Celebrate

2010-12-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

"And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins."

2 Nephi 25:26

Merry Christmas!
We have so many reasons to rejoice.

image via this

home is...

2010-12-22T23:35:00.000-07:00

chocolate chip cookies
a fridge full of food I didn't make myself
graham crackers with peanut butter and chocolate chips
reruns of old tv shows like Andy Griffith
a brother who wants to be writer
seeing people I know everywhere
umpqua dairy chocolate milk
driving my big red truck
late night chats with dad
a double bed
not worrying about school
borrowing my mom's heels
no snow, and sunshine in december
people wanting to see me
high school friends
talking about health and nutrition with my mom
making resolutions to be better
being asked if I have a boyfriend yet
...and then being assured that I've still got time

I'm so happy to be home.
To relax and not worry about papers or tests.

I hope you're all having a wonderful holiday, wherever you are!

a story from the past--part two

2010-12-19T16:07:00.000-07:00

(a continuation of this story)

The change was so gradual, but the recognition of that change was surprisingly sudden.

It took a few backward glances at what was, compared to what is.

To see the distance between the two.

It took being a stranger to her past self to see that she was not that person anymore.

She didn't realize it until later.

Much later.

But a bit of confidence and a little faith can go a long way.

And life is so much better when you live it on purpose.

Instead of waiting for it to happen to you.

And there are still days when she wears sweat pants and no makeup and listens to sad songs just for the sake of listening to sad songs.

But on those days when she just wants to feel sad because she isn't feeling anything else, the rut isn't deep enough to take eight months to climb out of.

It's the kind of rut that is just part of life.

The kind that reminds her what happiness isn't.

So that she can remember what it is.

And that's okay.

Because that's just life.

image via vi.sualize.us

simplify

2010-12-18T14:24:00.000-07:00

It's halfway through the school year and I'm just finally unpacking half the boxes I moved in with.

Figures.

But at least I'm doing it, right?

It feels so great to get rid of all the stuff I don't need.

To take a big box of clothes that don't fit/don't look good/I'm bored with/aren't my style to DI and say goodbye to them.

I always sleep better in a room that isn't full of junk.

I found my old pointe shoes and leotards while I was cleaning out our storage room and I was reminded of the many opportunities I've been blessed with over the years.*

I put the leotards and ballet skirt in the giveaway pile, for some future ballerina to find.

But I kept the pointe shoes.

Because they taught me that hard work means blisters and tired feet and sore muscles.

And doing the same routine over and over and over.

But it also means getting to show off, just a little bit, when the work really pays off.

*And that really made me want to take a jazz or ballet class. It's funny how I came to college all excited to leave jazz behind and move on to ballroom. And don't get me wrong, I really do love ballroom. But sometimes I miss the grand jetes and the pirouettes and the tour jetes that my arms and feet grew up with.

image via deviantart

a story from the past

2010-12-17T09:47:00.000-07:00

She had been in a foul mood since June

But she was blind to her own bad attitude.

Well, mostly blind.

She knew it was there.

It was like that conversation you never want to bring up.

Because you know it's not going to end well.

So she just let it stay there.

It kept her company.

But she didn't realize how much it defined her for that time in her life.

She didn't believe how many "he's" might have wanted to be with her.

Because she was so focused on one particular "he" that wanted everything but her.

And even sometimes, she still wonders what those other "he's" saw in her.

Because she felt so broken so much of the time.

What did they see behind that face of strength she kept up until she closed the door to her tiny little room and crawled into bed?

What made them get her out of bed to go do something to feel like she was alive?

But the big question is: why is she different now? what changed?

image via deviantart

cannonball--take two

2010-12-17T00:38:00.000-07:00

Remember that one time when I was going to be brave?

And just go for it

head first

without worrying about how deep the water was?

I think I'm failing

and I'm too tired to try and catch myself.

Let alone anyone else.

At Her Fingertips--a series of three poems

2010-12-14T16:16:00.002-07:00

Eight

She stood with two feet barely
Balancing on the knobby, uneven roots
Of the maple skyscraper in her backyard

Her eyes drew a line
From trunk to tip
Where green fades into blue

So many branches,
And she’d never been very good
At making decisions

He offered his hand to help her
Up to the thick, stable branch just above her fingertips

“I can do it myself,” she countered.

But he said, “Yes you can,
But you don’t need to.”
................................................

Twenty-Eight

She walked down the street
Not watching where she was walking
But who she was walking past.

Their faces told of birthdays and breakups,
Lost and found love,
A soundtrack to the pattern of their steps.

She looked at their eyes,
Curious if anyone wanted to know her story
But no one looked back

Then with a brush of his hand on hers
As he walked by

He whispered her name
And stopped.

................................................
Seventy-Eight

He laced his fingers through hers
As they took a walk
Down the hall with the white tile floors
And that smell that was too clean for the sickness it held.

She imagined they were barefoot on a beach
In Morocco
Forty-five years ago
After wearing an ivory dress and a gardenia in her hair

He tipped the driver of the rusty green cab
That had been their getaway car
And had carried her to the door
Of the quiet cabin that would be their castle

But that night,
When he lifted her onto a bed of clean white sheets
And crawled in beside her

They just slept
And that was enough.

{I wrote these for my creative writing class. I'm deciding that I really like poetry. Writing and reading it.}

praise His name forever

2010-12-11T19:59:00.000-07:00

"Rejoice evermore.
Pray without ceasing.
In every thing give thanks:
for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18

I love this message.
We have so many reasons to rejoice.

Today I am rejoicing because of mornings that don't begin at 6:30am, catching up with old friends, and time to eat dinner at the dinner table.

Why are you rejoicing?

thought of you

2010-12-10T17:08:00.001-07:00

I saw this yesterday.

It was like coming home.

*Thanks to Ryan Woodward for making this masterpiece. It is absolutely stunning. I can't say enough good things about it, so i'll just leave it at that.

the way to my heart

2010-12-04T14:38:00.000-07:00

Love-to-be:

Let's bring it all to the table.

Your strengths.

My weaknesses.

Your faults.

My gifts.

And let's make music from all the discord in our lives.

image via weheartit

feeling the pressure

2010-11-30T15:14:00.000-07:00

Literally

and

figuratively.

I always seem to get sick (and feel pretty awful) for about a day and a half. After which, I feel completely fine. But oh, that day and a half is a nightmare.

Especially when I have two media law papers due on Wednesday.*

And a short story to finish.

And a birthday present to buy/get/send to my little brother.

And finals coming up in less than 2 weeks.

All I want to do is take NyQuil and sleep for like 48 hours.

Mental explosion meets sinus pressure equals major fail at life.

*all day today I kept thinking it was Wednesday and it was stressing me out. majorly.

What you're doing this Saturday:

2010-11-18T17:52:00.000-07:00

This is what I spent a few hours on yesterday.

It was really fun to play around in Illustrator.*

Two more reasons to convince you to come:

-My semi-famous peanut butter brownies (actually, it's my mom's recipe, but I brought their fame to my corner of the world)

-I'll be singing a little song with my friend Clark.

So come stuff your belly and fill your ears with the feel good sounds of doing some good in the world.

*slowly checking off #3 on this list.

Currently obsessing over:

2010-11-16T09:18:00.000-07:00

Can I just say that I love everything about this?

Oh, to sing a duet with Andrea Bocelli.

In Italian.

Someday, I want to be able to understand this without having to use Google Language Tools.

Walk the World

2010-11-15T13:08:00.001-07:00

This blog is not generally a forum for discussion, but today I feel like discussing just a little bit.

I read this interesting little article from Zen Habits.*

Lately, since I've been so busy and stressed, I've also been semi-addicted to Zen Habits. There are some things they say don't really work for my life right now, but there are a lot of really good insights about how to make life more simple and less stressful.

This section really stuck with me:

"Yes, it sometimes take longer to get places — maybe 20 minutes instead of 10-15, or 45 minutes instead of 25-30. But that’s OK, because cars (while faster) are also more stressful. Driving in traffic is stressful. So we go places slower, which is less stressful, more fun. I like a slower life."

I like a slower life, too.

I love the idea of living in a place where I can walk almost anywhere I need to go.

I love walking, and I really believe that you see the world differently by foot than you do by car.

Sometimes I don't even see the world if I'm driving. I zone out, which is not only dangerous, but takes the fun out of getting wherever I'm going.

Over the past year or so, I've really come to appreciate public transportation.

It's so convenient.

It's relatively inexpensive.

And it's great for people-watching.

What do you think about all this?

*Some of you know that I don't really like driving, but know that it's the stressful 15 minute drives that I'm not a huge fan of. I'm always up for a good road trip. But, who knows, maybe I can take a cross-country train trip. Or a cross-country bike trip like these friends of mine.

the shorter story

2010-11-13T11:22:00.000-07:00

Some people like to go to haunted houses and watch scary movies and let their imaginations run wild to feel that thrill of utter horror and fright.

But I've never been like that.

I'm the one who watches sad movies when I'm happy.
And listens to rainy day music when it's bright and sunny.
And cries not only in movies but at the end of really good books.
Whose idea of a perfect Saturday morning is curling up in a blanket with a mug of hot cocoa and watching something like "The Way We Were."

Because there is something about that heartbreaking, purely human rush of delicious melancholy that gets me every time.

If I can make this night light enough to move*

2010-11-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

Today I felt optimistic.

About life and love.

I just had this overwhelming feeling that it's all going to turn out alright.

And that it's alright even right now.

So even in the middle of this storm of stress and unchecked to do lists and half-baked efforts at greatness, this is what keeps me going:

1. Tomorrow I get to walk onto the dance floor with one of my best friends and have SO MUCH FUN.

2. I'm too young to have regrets. And too young to be completely realistic.

3. Lots and lots of compliments on this little success.

4. I might get to sleep in on Saturday morning.

5. Aced my Media Law test. Boom baby!

6. Life is unexpected. And that is frighteningly exhilarating.

7. I only have one class tomorrow.

8. I get to check another state off my list in a couple weeks. (Tennessee, here I come!)

9. Today I felt pretty. Really pretty.

I think next semester I'm going to start clearing out some of the junk in my closet, and cover my walls in sticky notes with dreams and goals and good thoughts for myself.

Something makes me think that will be awfully fulfilling.

image via weheartit, this

*Listen to this. Now.

Would you believe me if I told you this was my homework?

2010-11-11T00:54:00.000-07:00

Because it was.

For my advertising concepts class tomorrow, we are having a creative food potluck of sorts.

And this is what I'm bringing.

And if you were wondering, I did eat the bite out of the corner at 1am when I finished this baby.

Baking is my yoga.

*this photo, taken by myself (this is new...) proves several things:

1. I am a copywriter, not an art director, meaning the concept is great. The visual execution....well let's just say I'm not a perfectionist.

2. I actually do own a camera. And I just discovered that my laptop has a memory card slot thingy...well, look at that.

3. I make dang good brownies.

Frankly Scarlet

2010-11-09T00:04:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when you spend all day on campus, walking from class to class with wet feet in wet shoes and glasses covered in water droplets, it means you stay up way too late to paint your nails a ridiculously named shade of red when you should be sleeping.

And then you curl up into your many many blankets and dream of handwritten letters and pin curls and red lipstick.

please don't break me

2010-11-08T09:56:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I divided a piece of notebook paper into six sections and wrote the days of the next week on them. I color coded all of my responsibilities into: adlab, school, dance, and miscellaneous.

Next week will be better? Hopefully. The problem isn't that I'm committed to a lot of things I don't really want to do. The problem is that I'm committed to too many things that I really want to do. But I can't fully enjoy any of them because I'm always thinking about the next one.

Next semester I am scheduling at least an hour a day to do absolutely nothing.
Or to eat.
Or take a nap.
Or write or read, just for fun.

Or maybe I really will sit and stare at the corner and think about blank pages and white walls and lists with only one to do item on them:

1. Breathe

ps: how does Colby know exactly what to post to make me feel better? Loving this quote, stolen from her blog:

"You belong among the wildflowers. You belong in a boat out at sea. You belong with your love on your arm. You belong somewhere you feel free."
- Tom Petty

image via this

No one is too small to make a difference

2010-11-02T22:40:00.001-07:00

Hey all you blog friends who bumped into my corner of the web. Let me tell you about what has been consuming my life lately. In a gets-me-going-in-the-morning, makes-me-want-to-change-the-world, feeling-like-I-actually-can kind of way. This is the kind of stuff that keeps my blood running and my feet moving even when I'm running on little to no sleep.

Tipping Bucket is an incredible organization that has been able to do so much in the short time they've been up and running. To date, they have restored eyesight to Ugandans, lit up rural African schools that didn't have electricity, and provided support and vocational training to victims of sex-trafficking in Southeast Asia.

Tipping Bucket helps passionately charged people with great ideas but limited resources make those ideas come to life. They do this through many small donations from people with big hearts.

All of this is building up to me telling you that Tipping Bucket is entered into the Pepsi Refresh competition for November. They are in the category to win a $250,000 grant that will help them expand their organization and increase their ability to fund more projects.

This is why I do advertising. This is why I sacrifice time, sleep, energy, and a lot of other things for the BYU Adlab.

Help us help them win!

It's easy:

1) Tell your friends. (Link to this post, to the Tipping Bucket website, blog/tweet/facebook it. Don't be shy, you social media mavens you)

2)VOTE: At www.tippingbucket.org, you can vote 3 times a day. Click the two links on the website and text "104182" to 73774(PEPSI) EACH day in November.**

Thank you in advance! Every vote counts!

*If you’re inspired and would like to join the “street team” helping to make this happen, just send your name and email address to pepsi@tippingbucket.org. That will get you on the list for a daily 2-minute-task email and update on our progress toward seizing this great opportunity!

**If you'd like to receive a reminder text each day throughout November send "22046" to 27138
.

cowboy take me away

2010-10-31T21:56:00.000-07:00

Maybe I need to add one more thing to the poll on my sidebar: go spend the summer with my extended southern family in beautiful South Carolina. Oh and this little ad shop intrigues me.

Hmm..I wonder what interning in the South would be like. Do they down too many cups of sweet tea instead of coffee, and have big porches instead of basketball courts? Do they still wear suits and say "Yes, Ma'am"? Do they get late night bbq instead of Chinese?

I fell in love with the South when I was 8 years old.

And I wonder if I'd make a better southern belle or city girl.

I think I might like the pace of the South better than the hustle and bustle of the city.

But, then again, there is something magical about the city that never sleeps.

"I want to walk and not run.

I want to skip and not fall.

I want to look at the horizon

and not see a building standing tall."

-Dixie Chicks

image found from the lovely colby ranae on Pray Hard. Live Easy.

Check the sidebar ---->

2010-10-29T12:02:00.000-07:00

So...I know that summer is about six months away.

But I'm trying to decide what I want to do, which is where I'll be placing my efforts for those next six months.

I'm just curious what the world wide web-sters think I should do.

So vote.

Please?

(images from google)

million

2010-10-28T19:55:00.000-07:00

New York Department of Education - Million from Sebastian Garn on Vimeo.

This is why I believe in the power of creativity to do good in the world.

This is why I love advertising.

one fine day, you're gonna want me for your girl

2010-10-27T21:29:00.001-07:00

Jack: Maybe you should let somebody help you out every once in a while.

Melanie: Definitely not. I've got all of these little balls up in the air. And if somebody else caught one for me, I'd drop them all.

-One Fine Day

Today I feel like I'm barely keeping all the little balls from crashing to the ground.

And I wish I knew how or who to ask for help.

I need a mental health day.

Or a good old fashioned Saturday.

A day to curl up in many many blankets (because our heat is not working right now), make a huge mug of hot cocoa, and watch a silly movie that will make me cry and laugh in the same hour and a half.*

*As my friend Clark pointed out, 90s chick flicks are the best. I agree. Am I old enough to say things like, "they just don't make them like they used to.."?

**On another note, I liked One Fine Day so much that I taped it when it was on TV and still have an old, worn out VHS copy with commercials. Maybe the plot is incredibly unrealistic, but I don't even care. Maybe it's not. Maybe you can meet someone on the worst day of your year and things could turn out alright. And this song is half of the reason I love the movie.

just found this little gem:

2010-10-26T23:21:00.000-07:00

"This is not a beauty that steals upon your unawares, that flatters and soothes your bruised spirit; this is not a beauty that you can hold in your hand and call your own and put in its place among familiar beauties that you know: it is a beauty that batters you and stuns you and leaves you breathless; there is no calmness in it nor control; it is like a fire that on a sudden consumes you, and you are left shaken and bare and yet by a strange miracle alive."

-Somerset Maugham, from his essay "Mandalay"

these foolish things

2010-10-24T15:55:00.000-07:00

Today as I was tidying up my room, Nat King Cole and the sound of rain in the background, I thought about how lovely life is.

Even on days when the power goes out, and it's cold and rainy, and sometimes a little lonely.

The learning and loving and moments of loneliness can be so sweet.

This song started playing and I decided that someday I will dance to it and it will be terribly romantic. As all songs by Nat King Cole are.*

"A tinkling piano in the next apartment

Those stumblin' words that told you what my heart meant

A fairground's painted swings

These foolish things

Remind me of you."

I love rainy day music. It's so...cleansing. Just like the rain.

image via vi.sualize.us (isn't it just gorgeous?)

*According to this little peek into my 16 year old self, Nat King Cole is already on the list to be played at my wedding reception. I'm not sure how many of the other songs I'll keep. But definitely Mr. Cole.

Food Rules

2010-10-13T21:19:00.000-07:00

Oh this just came in the mail yesterday.
And I might have read all 64 "rules" before I went to bed last night.

{But I'm saving the explanations and fine print to savor later.}

Favorites:
"Eat all the junk food you want as long as you cook it yourself."
"The banquet is in the first bite."

"Spend as much time enjoying the meal as it took to prepare it."

Go eat something you love.

And really taste it.

*Maybe this will help with #17 on this list.

all we can do is keep breathing*

2010-10-12T16:11:00.000-07:00

As I took a precious moment (or 20) to blogsurf this afternoon, I read this post from Zen Habits.

I love that blog.

So much of what they say just hits home.

After reading that post, I went to this website (because it was mentioned in the post).

And now I want to buy this book.*

I love books.

I wish I spent more time with them.

{I know this is in my control, and that I just need to prioritize better, and make time to read, because I do have a whole 16 or 17 hours while I'm awake each day.}

Anyway, I feel like I've been swimming through the past month. Like I'm still barely holding on to getting things done and not falling behind.

I don't feel behind.

I'm caught up.

But I'm just barely caught up.

I'm barely getting through each day without falling asleep in all of my classes or neglecting any major responsibilities.

So really, I'm fine.

But there are so many things I want to do.

I want to read AdAge every morning.

I want to skim through the pages of the New York Times and feel like I know what's going on in the world.

I want to have the time to write blog posts that are creative and stretch my verbal capabilities, instead of to do lists and posts about not having time.**

I want to do yoga, and go running (for once in my life, I actually want to go running).

I want to eat breakfast sitting down.

I want to have time to do my hair in the morning, instead of pretending I'm enough of a granola to let it air dry and have it look fabulous every day.

I want to not fall asleep reading my scriptures every night.

I want to take advantage of all the blessings and opportunities that surround me.

The funny part is, I'm not unhappy.

I love my life.

It is so full of wonderful, exciting things.

It's just that, sometimes, it's a little too full.

So, for tonight, I'm going to tidy up my room.

Eat my dinner slowly.

And remember to breathe.

image via weheartit

*Have I already bought myself too many birthday presents? {Landon Pigg "The Boy Who Never", Food Rules, and Let the Great World Spin.}

**Ironic???

***Ingrid. Yay. Love her. Also, she's coming to Utah on October 26th. Any takers?

xo

2010-10-11T13:07:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I honestly believe all I need in life is an endless supply of good hugs and forehead kisses.

this lovely image via vi.sualize.us