a taste

Today I wore no jacket to school.

And I walked to class

And I wasn't cold.

California runs through my blood and I crave the beach almost as much as I crave chocolate.

Today felt a little bit like the beginning of spring, and the end of a winter that wasn't the most stressful, but it had its moments.

Today was a day when the world was conquered.

When somehow everything came together and worked, even when I was sure it wouldn't.

And for that, I am grateful.

images via this

simplify

It's halfway through the school year and I'm just finally unpacking half the boxes I moved in with.

Figures.

But at least I'm doing it, right?

It feels so great to get rid of all the stuff I don't need.

To take a big box of clothes that don't fit/don't look good/I'm bored with/aren't my style to DI and say goodbye to them.

I always sleep better in a room that isn't full of junk.

I found my old pointe shoes and leotards while I was cleaning out our storage room and I was reminded of the many opportunities I've been blessed with over the years.*

I put the leotards and ballet skirt in the giveaway pile, for some future ballerina to find.

But I kept the pointe shoes.

Because they taught me that hard work means blisters and tired feet and sore muscles.

And doing the same routine over and over and over.

But it also means getting to show off, just a little bit, when the work really pays off.

*And that really made me want to take a jazz or ballet class. It's funny how I came to college all excited to leave jazz behind and move on to ballroom. And don't get me wrong, I really do love ballroom. But sometimes I miss the grand jetes and the pirouettes and the tour jetes that my arms and feet grew up with.

image via deviantart

Walk the World

This blog is not generally a forum for discussion, but today I feel like discussing just a little bit.

I read this interesting little article from Zen Habits.*

Lately, since I've been so busy and stressed, I've also been semi-addicted to Zen Habits. There are some things they say don't really work for my life right now, but there are a lot of really good insights about how to make life more simple and less stressful.

This section really stuck with me:

"Yes, it sometimes take longer to get places — maybe 20 minutes instead of 10-15, or 45 minutes instead of 25-30. But that’s OK, because cars (while faster) are also more stressful. Driving in traffic is stressful. So we go places slower, which is less stressful, more fun. I like a slower life."

I like a slower life, too.

I love the idea of living in a place where I can walk almost anywhere I need to go.

I love walking, and I really believe that you see the world differently by foot than you do by car.

Sometimes I don't even see the world if I'm driving. I zone out, which is not only dangerous, but takes the fun out of getting wherever I'm going.

Over the past year or so, I've really come to appreciate public transportation.

It's so convenient.

It's relatively inexpensive.

And it's great for people-watching.

What do you think about all this?

*Some of you know that I don't really like driving, but know that it's the stressful 15 minute drives that I'm not a huge fan of. I'm always up for a good road trip. But, who knows, maybe I can take a cross-country train trip. Or a cross-country bike trip like these friends of mine.

all we can do is keep breathing*

As I took a precious moment (or 20) to blogsurf this afternoon, I read this post from Zen Habits.

I love that blog.

So much of what they say just hits home.

After reading that post, I went to this website (because it was mentioned in the post).

And now I want to buy this book.*

I love books.

I wish I spent more time with them.

{I know this is in my control, and that I just need to prioritize better, and make time to read, because I do have a whole 16 or 17 hours while I'm awake each day.}

Anyway, I feel like I've been swimming through the past month. Like I'm still barely holding on to getting things done and not falling behind.

I don't feel behind.

I'm caught up.

But I'm just barely caught up.

I'm barely getting through each day without falling asleep in all of my classes or neglecting any major responsibilities.

So really, I'm fine.

But there are so many things I want to do.

I want to read AdAge every morning.

I want to skim through the pages of the New York Times and feel like I know what's going on in the world.

I want to have the time to write blog posts that are creative and stretch my verbal capabilities, instead of to do lists and posts about not having time.**

I want to do yoga, and go running (for once in my life, I actually want to go running).

I want to eat breakfast sitting down.

I want to have time to do my hair in the morning, instead of pretending I'm enough of a granola to let it air dry and have it look fabulous every day.

I want to not fall asleep reading my scriptures every night.

I want to take advantage of all the blessings and opportunities that surround me.

The funny part is, I'm not unhappy.

I love my life.

It is so full of wonderful, exciting things.

It's just that, sometimes, it's a little too full.

So, for tonight, I'm going to tidy up my room.

Eat my dinner slowly.

And remember to breathe.

image via weheartit

*Have I already bought myself too many birthday presents? {Landon Pigg "The Boy Who Never", Food Rules, and Let the Great World Spin.}

**Ironic???

***Ingrid. Yay. Love her. Also, she's coming to Utah on October 26th. Any takers?

Suitcase Heart

Loving these lyrics by the Weepies:

I held so many people in my suitcase heart

That I had to let the whole thing go

Sometimes I stretch myself too thin.

I try to be everything to everyone.

And end up losing myself and what I want.

Because sometimes it's okay to care about what I want.

And to sometimes put myself first.

Because if I don't take care of myself, how can I do anything for anybody else?

So out of the crazy, hectic, wonderful busy-ness of this semester, this is what I want:

-to create a decent start on my creative portfolio (and maybe compete in YoungGuns?)

-to get rid of a lot of stuff that I just keep lying around my house. Simplify.

-to make some good habits: eating less sugar and more vegetables, flossing, reading for fun

Anyway.

I love my life. I really do.

I am so blessed with so many opportunities.

But sometimes I think I need to relearn the lesson of Good, Better, Best. :

We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives.

I think sometimes I have too many good things in my life, and I neglect a few of the "Best" things.

So this semester is going to be another semester of learning. Because that's what education is about.

Not just books.

Or tests.*

It's about life.

And learning how to do it right.

*like the one I need to be studying for right now.

An Eater's Manifesto

I love Michael Pollan's thought: "Eat Food. Mostly Plants. Not Too Much."

In Defense of Food is definitely on my list of books to read in the near future.

But today I am coming up with my own manifesto.

{Sit down.

Eat slowly.

There is no need for dessert with every meal.}

Three simple rules I am trying to live by.

What is your food manifesto?

manifesto for the school year

"Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength."

-August Wilson

There are some things I feel like I've slacked on this summer.

Not that this summer was a failure.

Not at all.

But I feel like I was just so busy and caught up in the many things I was doing (good things, mind you), that I lost a little bit of who I am.

Just a little bit.

I slacked off a little bit in some things that are important to me.

Just a little bit.

This is not me ragging on myself or moping about the past.

This is just me recommitting to a life I love.

A life that is full of passion and character and a few blue recycling bins.

A life of living the principle that less is more.

And that books and music and writing and good quality entertainment are not a waste of time.

That these books mean so much more when I'm not half-asleep.

That playing is just as important to my health as working.

And that learning is a privilege, not a burden.

So I'm going to unpack the boxes in my room, and figure out what to keep, what to get rid of and what to put away until I decide how important it is to me.

And recommit to loving the life God gave me. And remembering what is important.

image from this fabulous girl

nothing wrong with a little change

Love-to-be:

Please choose your occupation because it's something you love, not simply because it will make you loads of money.

I've told you before, it's not about the money.

I will love you just as much for your passion for what you do as for the inventive ways we will stretch our dollars.

Love it enough to do it for 20, 30 or 40 years, but love me enough to let it mellow into a conversation topic when you come home.

Let it be your profession, your passion, but not your life.

I always admire men who choose a career that may not be the most financially cushy, but that is something they truly enjoy.

So. Whatever you choose to do, do it with passion.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a doctor or a lawyer or even an advertising man. There is no reason you should feel guilty for making six figures. That would just give us more opportunities to do good, and I would love that.

All of this is just to say that if what acts as your figurative cup of coffee in the morning is the thought of teaching 17-year olds about The Cold War or mitosis or Shakespeare, we will be just fine.

We'll live in a small*, older house, with chipped paint and a kitchen table we'll refinish ourselves.

We'll find adventures in weekend camping trips and coveted nights out, but mostly in good conversation and great food.

Made by yours truly, of course.

We'll learn to save our pennies and nickels and dimes and when we finally have enough to take that big trip to Europe or South America or Africa that we've always wanted to take, we'll appreciate it that much more.

So, dear, do what you love, love what you do, and love me too.

*I don't much care for housework, anyway. So, in my opinion, the less house to clean, the better.

image via deviantart

more than just a pair of shoes

I really like this.

My favorite part is:

"it's time to get greedy for the stuff that really matters"

And the shoes are pretty rad too.

Too bad they are way out of my budget.

At least for now.

Maybe I'll splurge...

next summer.

all i need

to the future love-of-my-life:
i don't need a diamond; i'm not even sure I want any gem at all. all I really need is a thin little band around that special finger; just something that will say to everyone else that i'm yours, forever.

and i don't need a big, expensive house; just a space we can call our own, a place to build our life, and make our memories.

i don't need you to make lots of money; just enough. and we will be smart and creative with it.

{what i do need is}: for you to love me back. all of me. even the parts that are quirky and weird and don't seem to fit. the part that is stubborn and doesn't always play well with others. the part that secretly wants to give all our wealth away to feed Africa. the part that craves adventure. the part that is easily scared. the part that can be dramatic and irrational and sometimes cries for no reason. the part that is completely and utterly, human. {for you to want all that, forever. so we can say "i love you" with as much feeling at twenty-two, seventy-two, or one-million-and-two.}

that's all i need.

and you don't have to know it by our third date, or even our thirty-third date.

until you do:

pictures via this and that