Open for Discussion

I've been thinking lately about natural dispositions.

How the mood people generally wake up in is different for everyone.

Curious, pensive, optimistic, ANNOYED, content.

And how sometimes a person's natural disposition colors the way they look to you. The way you think about them. How much you enjoy spending time with them, or what sorts of things you enjoy doing with them.

Because I think people are usually more beautiful when they are happy.

And I'm curious what others' thoughts are about this subject.

I'm curious what my natural disposition is, what other people see it as, and what I think it is.

And if the two differ.

So tell me your thoughts.

About yourself.

About me.

About your friends.

About the subject in general.

"I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition."

Martha Washington

"Let all your things be done with charity." {1 Corinthians 16:14}

i've been thinking a lot about understanding people.

and how it takes knowing someone for longer than a day, or a month, or a year, or even a lifetime, to really understand the ins and outs of who they are and why they are who they are.

there is always more to learn about someone.

new ways to love them.

better perspective.

i've been thinking a bit about how everyone is different.

and everyone has different struggles.

and i've realized that the things that come naturally for me, don't always come naturally for others.

honestly, i hadn't really thought about that before.

and i've been feeling pretty grateful.

for all i have been blessed with.

which is a lot.

and i think this understanding that people are different only increases my love for them.

because it's nice to remember that i'm not the only one who isn't perfect.

and that we're all trying.

and fighting our different battles.

and that, in the end, it's not about winners or losers.

it's about who is still standing on the battle field, when the war is finally over,

and there is finally peace on earth.

"Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth..."

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

image via deviantart

i don't wanna sit on the pavement while you fly, but I will*

Sometimes you just have to throw your hair up into a messy bun,
and shrug off the world,

and realize that no matter what is driving you absolutely mad right now,

There is always new air to breathe tomorrow.

image via sabino

*ingrid, you rock. that's all.

long time coming

" She leaned over to him and said, 'we've been in love for so long.'
He said, 'you're the only girl I've ever loved, and I've loved you since I was 15.' "

Congratulations to my friends Kortney and Clayton!
(they got married on Friday)

If you ask me, they've been made for each other since they were in high school, and I'm so happy for them.

nothing wrong with a little change

Love-to-be:

Please choose your occupation because it's something you love, not simply because it will make you loads of money.

I've told you before, it's not about the money.

I will love you just as much for your passion for what you do as for the inventive ways we will stretch our dollars.

Love it enough to do it for 20, 30 or 40 years, but love me enough to let it mellow into a conversation topic when you come home.

Let it be your profession, your passion, but not your life.

I always admire men who choose a career that may not be the most financially cushy, but that is something they truly enjoy.

So. Whatever you choose to do, do it with passion.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a doctor or a lawyer or even an advertising man. There is no reason you should feel guilty for making six figures. That would just give us more opportunities to do good, and I would love that.

All of this is just to say that if what acts as your figurative cup of coffee in the morning is the thought of teaching 17-year olds about The Cold War or mitosis or Shakespeare, we will be just fine.

We'll live in a small*, older house, with chipped paint and a kitchen table we'll refinish ourselves.

We'll find adventures in weekend camping trips and coveted nights out, but mostly in good conversation and great food.

Made by yours truly, of course.

We'll learn to save our pennies and nickels and dimes and when we finally have enough to take that big trip to Europe or South America or Africa that we've always wanted to take, we'll appreciate it that much more.

So, dear, do what you love, love what you do, and love me too.

*I don't much care for housework, anyway. So, in my opinion, the less house to clean, the better.

image via deviantart

Some Kind of Story, Part Four

She remembered a time when all it took to make her swoon was an acoustic guitar and letting a boy teach her how to play the first few bars of "Smoke on the Water."

A time before drum sets and the boys that sat behind them.

A time when butterflies were triggered by rainy day love songs and that spunk and confidence that always seems to come with being a musician.

She remembered a time when unpredictable was exciting and returned affection was maybe too much to take.

But now she dreams of bare feet on hardwood floors and mortgage payments and disagreements over paint colors.

A life that, though imperfect, will be perfect for her.

And butterflies that never get old.

solitary soul

Things I love doing by myself*:

-watching movies

-shopping...because I can take my time

-getting lost in a used bookstore

-reading one of those used books, while drinking hot cocoa with a shot of hazelnut at a quaint little coffee shop.
-learning about the wonders (and not so pretty aspects) of mass transit

Next week I am going home for my friends' wedding (two friends from high school who are getting married to each other), and I get to explore the wonderful city of Portland.

I'm getting into the city in the morning, but I'm not meeting up with friends until afternoon or evening.

But, you see, I planned this.

I love exploring new places, and don't mind doing that by myself at all.
I fully plan on getting lost in Powell's City of Books for at least two hours.

After which, I will probably meander over to Mio Gelato for a bambino of donatella gelato.

I want to find a great place for lunch. I'm thinking maybe Indian food.

I'll probably spend some time at Oblation Papers & Press and Everyday Music.

But, most of all, I hope to find a new favorite place to visit when I go to Portland. A bakery, or restaurant, or record store.

And I hope to feel a bit more like a city girl, and a little bit more like a more grown up.

image via google

*this is not to say that I don't enjoy doing these things with other people.

I only wanna break break oh break break breakdown.

To do list for this week:

Stay alive.

Keep breathing.

Learn to juggle.

image via deviantart